all I want to do is hate people

at the rate at which I keep letting people down, I'm not going to have any friends left here. it would be so easy to just ride away from it all. I always do and I always come back but there's got to be a breaking point. there's got to be a point where I am just no longer welcome here.
I know they generally don't really give a shit, but will they eventually get so sick of my bouncing emotions that they just don't want to bother with me anymore?

I want to talk like we used to, sitting on roofs and sharing sweatshirts when I got cold.

also, I miss tj a lot. he's the only person who hasn't acted with complete indifference towards me in these past few days. that's not necessarily true but it really feels that way.

(also, I finished "bummertime 200h8- the zine. I made it in two hours last night in a fit of motivation. I made copies this morning and I'm selling them for $2-$3 (just to kind of offset the price of color copying))